DEAR ABBY: I am an active older man. To keep my beard looking attractive, the hairdresser trims it every two weeks. I’ve had the same stylist for three years now and we’ve become good friends to the point where she invited me over to her house for dinner with her family. I have been there several times but on the last occasion she said something strange and I believe disrespectful.
She is a very attractive fifty year old lady. When I arrived at her house, I stayed with her parents while she and her son (and possibly her husband) prepared the meal. When it was done she brought me my plate and then served her parents. I was shocked that she was wearing what she called a swimsuit. To me it was the most revealing thong and bra I had ever seen and two inches away from being naked. Earlier that day when she was doing my beard she was wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt.
Her excuse for the “swimsuit” was that there was something wrong with her hip that required a patch, and she couldn’t wear clothes over it because it would put too much pressure on the affected area. (I’m not buying it.) I felt that if nothing else, she could have worn at least one of her husband’s shirts. I felt embarrassed and insulted. Even though I didn’t say anything, I decided that I would never go to her house again. Should I tell her why if she asks? — LOOKING GOOD IN COLORADO
DEAR YOU LOOK GOOD: Your “barber(ella)” did not entertain you alone. Her parents, her son and (maybe) her husband were also there. She was obviously comfortable enough around you that she was wearing something she usually wears in this environment and had no idea you would react the way you did. From now on, politely decline her dinner invitations. If she asks why, I don’t think it would be rude to tell her that you felt embarrassed that she wasn’t more covered up. It’s true.
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