Dear Miss Manners: I live in an area known for terrible coffee, so my friends and neighbors often go out for espresso. They know I take the process of making a quality drink seriously with an espresso machine/grinder and a milk frother.
Even though upon arrival I make sure the machine is filled, the cups are heated and the filter is ready to make a fresh cup, the process is very loud and I can’t hear my guest while preparing the desired drink.
What would be the proper way to let them know I can’t hear them while I finish the five minute task of making a drink? And should I leave them standing there or sit them down?
GENTLE READER: Since we’re being careful with coffee, Miss Manners recommends also specifying the problem. You don’t have to tell your neighbors that you can’t hear them over the coffee grinder; this will be obvious as soon as you press the button.
The problem is that you can’t politely press that button when asked a question. Wait for a pause, so point to the grinder, say “Excuse me” and grind. You can repeat this process for each noise generation step if needed.
Even the most situationally unaware neighbor should be able to remain politely quiet in hopes of getting a caffeine fix.
*** ***
DEAR MISS MANERS: I have long been troubled by the carol “Have a Merry Christmas,” specifically the insinuation that if we don’t give uninvited guests their fig pudding, they “won’t come.”
How should we handle this request? I don’t want to be ungrateful for their wishes, but I think their insistence is a little beyond what can be considered decent and reasonable. Can you advise how to proceed?
GENTLE READER: What was that? Miss Manners didn’t quite hear you over the commotion of laying geese, calling birds, French hens and lovebirds. Fortunately, the partridge seems to have passed out under the pear tree.
(Send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
COPYRIGHT 2025 JUDITH MARTIN
DISTRIBUTED BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION
1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106; 816-581-7500
Leave a Reply