For many, the holidays bring both joy and sorrow.
But for Emma Heming, wife of legendary “Die Hard” actor Bruce Willis, the holidays turned into another uphill battle for her family due to her husband’s battle with frontotemporal dementia (FTD).
The disease is a progressive condition of the brain.
In a new blog post Heming described her struggle with grief as the holidays used to be before Willis became ill.
Now Christmas will look much different than it did before.
The actor, 70, announced his diagnosis of FTD in February 2023. Then last summer, Heming, 47, revealed that the two began living separately to make it easier for Willis to access medical care.
The off season was not easy for Heming due to Willis’ debilitating condition. But the experience brought some bittersweet feelings as well as a dash of joy.
“Traditions that once seemed rather effortless require planning— much “Moments that once brought uncomplicated joy can come tangled in a web of sadness. I know this because I live it. But despite that, there can still be meaning. There can still be warmth. There can still be joy. I’ve learned that the holidays don’t disappear when dementia enters your life. They change.”
Heming said one of the hardest pills to swallow is grieving the life she and Willis had before all of this happened.
Especially since the iconic actor seemed to be soaking up the holiday cheer in the family-oriented season.
“He loved this time of year — the energy, the family time, the traditions,” Heming said. “He was a pancake maker. get out into the snow with the kids man, a constant presence passing through the house as the day unfolded. There was comfort in the routine of knowing exactly how the day would go, especially since I’m a creature of habit. Dementia doesn’t erase those memories. But it creates a space between then and now. And that space can hurt.”
Now there’s only a ton of space left to make new memories while there’s still time. But she admits it’s difficult to hold on to old memories because it’s a struggle Heming still faces.
Heming and Willis had two daughters together, Mabel Ray (born 2012) and Evelyn Penn (born 2014).
However, Heming continues to carry on the family’s holiday traditions despite how difficult things are now.
“This holiday season, our family will still be unwrapping presents and sitting down to breakfast together,” she said. “But instead of Bruce making our favorite pancakes, I’ll make it. And no, I can’t share the secret family recipe. We’ll play a holiday movie. There will be laughs and cuddles. And there will almost certainly be tears because we can grieve.” and make room for joy. Joy does not disturb sadness. Sadness does not destroy joy. They co-exist.”
Willis has appeared in more than 130 films and television shows in his career, including the Emmy Award-winning role of David Addison in Moonlighting and John McClane in the action franchise “Die Hard.” His credits also include “The Sixth Sense,” “Friends,” “Pulp Fiction,” “RED,” “The Expendables,” “Sin City,” “Lucky Number Slevin,” “Unbreakable,” “Armageddon,” “12 Monkeys,” “Death Becomes Her,” and “The Fifth Element.”
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